Social media is more popular than anything on planet Earth except for ketchup packets at McDonald’s. (Those babies are everywhere, man!) So naturally advertisers and marketers want to exploit this popularity, flooding sites like Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram with so many digital ads that the only original content left is usually an emoticon.
But social media marketers often go about advertising the wrong way, missing important niche markets and even driving away consumers. Here are several tips that will drive sales like mayonnaise on gelatin:
Make your brand name memorable
This is done with adjectives and superlatives, for example: “Aged Ice Cubes” or “Overpriced Hamburgers R Us.” Then make sure the same ‘handle’ is used on all social media platforms — so that the name “Bob’s Puny Plumbing Supply” is used consistently on everything from LinkedIn to Snapchat. That way consumers won’t get confused and wander off into the woods looking for James Comey instead of making an online purchase.
Use real testimonials
By ‘real’ is meant stuff that nobody can trace back to anyone. And by ‘testimonials’ is meant so much treacle that the reader is in danger of coming down with diabetes. And by ‘use’ is meant ‘apply’ or ‘employ’ or ‘exploit’ or ‘utilize’ or “a large civet cat native to Andalusia.’
Know your target audience
Are they tall or short or skinny or fat or old or young? Do they scratch their arms during football games or cut up their spaghetti instead of twirling it onto a fork? And are they in this country illegally? If so, be sure to rat them out for the bounty.